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Fall is the season of staying in. The light goes early, someone brings a blanket, and suddenly four people are sitting on one couch with nothing to do. A round of would you rather fits that mood: one question, one pick, no preparation.
Read one out right now and have everybody choose before anyone explains:
- Would you rather live somewhere with no seasons or somewhere with extreme seasons?
Then go around the room and ask why.
Every question here comes from Lolo Cards - 5,200+ conversation cards for iPhone.
Why a cozy night in suits this game
Everybody is comfortable, and phones start coming out. A would you rather question gives everyone something to answer, and the only rule is “pick a side.”
There is also a small study about sharing an experience. In a Yale study of 23 students, people tasted two squares of the same dark chocolate, one while a partner tasted it too and one while the partner looked at a booklet of paintings. They liked the shared square more and called it more flavorful. A second group tasted a bitter chocolate and liked the shared piece less. The researchers suggested that sharing an experience focuses attention, which may make both pleasant and unpleasant experiences more intense. It is a small study about chocolate, so don’t read too much into it.
The full set of questions behind this article lives in the would you rather questions collection. If you have never run a round before, how to play would you rather covers the rules in two minutes.
Sweater-weather picks to start the round
Open with the weather. These questions are easy to answer without sharing anything personal.
- Would you rather always feel slightly cold or always feel slightly too warm?
- Would you rather live in constant summer or constant winter?
- Would you rather always be slightly overdressed or always slightly underdressed?
Add a few of your own in the same style. Say them out loud as simple choices, like “hayride or haunted house?” or “apple picking or a pumpkin patch?” You don’t need a card for those. Just keep the shape: two options, both a little tempting, no right answer.
The overdressed question works well if people are about to go out. Follow it with “Who always brings the extra jacket?”
Cozy-at-home dilemmas
Once people have settled in, move to the questions that sound like the evening you are already having.
- Would you rather sleep on the floor with a pillow and blanket or on a bed with no pillow or blanket?
- Would you rather live without dessert forever or without your morning coffee forever?
- Would you rather live in a treehouse or a houseboat?
- Would you rather live without hot showers or without a washing machine?
Give the coffee fans time to explain their choice, then ask someone who chose dessert to make their case.
If you’re hosting, answer first and keep it to one sentence. That shows everyone how short an answer can be.
Autumn party and haunted-house questions
If you are hosting more than a few people, or it’s the week of a costume party, try questions about scares and plans gone wrong. They aren’t all would you rather questions, but you can use the same format: one question, everyone answers.
- Where did you scream the loudest: at a game, on a roller coaster, in a haunted house?
- It’s raining on the day of your picnic. Do you call it off or go anyway?
- Would you rather live without birthdays or without holidays?
Follow the haunted house question with “Who in this room screams first?” Let people point or name someone. If someone says they hate being scared, take that as their answer and move to the next card.
For more party openers that aren’t tied to a season, try fun questions to ask at a party.
Ending the night with a blanket fort
End the round before it gets stale. Ten questions is plenty, and the last one can be warm and a little silly.
- Tonight we build a huge blanket fort in the living room. What do we take inside with us?
Let everyone answer in turn and ask for specifics: a snack, a playlist, one friend’s terrible jokes.
Laughing together is also something people notice from the outside. In a UCLA-led study across 24 societies, listeners heard short clips of two people laughing and guessed whether they were friends or strangers. They were right 53 to 67 percent of the time, which is better than chance but far from perfect. It’s a modest finding: laughter carries some signal about how close people are. A game can’t promise you that closeness.
A simple way to run the night
Skip the scorekeeping and use these five steps:
- Pick ten questions before people arrive, or let someone read from the phone as they go.
- Start with the weather, then move to the cozy ones, then the scary ones.
- Everyone picks first, explains second.
- Allow a pass. Nobody owes an answer.
- Stop while it’s still fun.
